the jet lag is going to get you...

It's 2 in the morning and I am wide awake because my body thinks it's 8 am. Nina, and I arrived home last night. We had a marvelous time. I won't got though every detail. Nina did a good job of summarizing our trip on her blog. Though part of me didn't want to come home because I was far away from the responsibilities of life, (ie. working 2 jobs, paying bills, going back to filling my shoes again) the other part of me is glad to be home, becasue traveling can be tiring. George was very nice to (drop us off and) pick us up at the airport, of course, I let him borrow my car while we were away. On our way home I stopped at Fran's, (the lady for whom I cat sit) to have a short visit with her and pick up my paycheck. I had cat sat for her for 3 weeks before our trip, so I think that I got back about the same amount I spent on my vacation, aside from the airfare. It's too bad I have to go and shoo the whole thing off to world servants now to help pay for the remainder of my balance for my kenya trip. It's worth it though. I really need a moutain top experience (not that this trip wasn't a high point) but I need to reminded of the joy that fills my heart when I serve others out of willfullness (willingness), (not necessarily out of a job requirement).
I am very anxious to go to Kenya. I really can't wait. As far as I'm concerned that two weeks is not long enough for me. I could be there for two months, maybe even two years. Two weeks is too short. It just gives you enough time to settle down the disruption of leaving everything else behind and acclimate to your new surroundings, and begin building connections with teammembers and the people in the community of which your are serving only just long enough before you're all issued back on a plane and "deported" back home. It's like a watching a brief clip of a movie. You get to see a small portion of what it's about and how the story is beginning to unfold and no sooner then you are interested to see what happens next, they cut it off in the middle of a scene and you are disconnected from any more clips.
I'm anxious to find out what God has in store for me. He hasn't really answered any of my big profound prayers yet, but He has been answering these silly little prayers of mine (and immediately too), and even when my attiitude has been more selfish and annoyed, like after 5 minutes of light rain, "Lord, please let it stop raining here in Ireland" and the rain stopped no sooner than the prayer was ended, or "Lord, please calm the crying babies on this plane" and right there after not another tear was shed for the remainder of the flight. He's teaching me that if I can trust him with the small piddily things that don't really matter, how more so will He attend to the deepest cares of my heart in time.
It's not that I haven't been putting my trust in God. I have, but sometimes in life you need to be reminded of these things. Like for example, the minute you step foot in a plane, you are immediately entrusting your life in the hands of the pilot. The fact whether you make it to your final destination, or not, is out of your control but is assumed by someone hopefully qualified to do the job. Some people may not waste a second thought on the fact that there could be a mechanical problem, or that the pilot could be overtaken by a terrorist, causing the plane to go down. These are extremely unlikely possibilities, but have happend before in the past, eh? But they just sit and enjoy the ride, face plastered to the window looking at all the white puffy clouds below. Then, there's some people who get on the plane with no worries, doubts or fears, but the moment the plane flies through even light turbulance, or an unuaual noise is heard, a wave of tension or maybe even panic enters their minds, until the plane become silent and still again. Or there's the people that have to dope themselves up with muscle relaxers and alcohol, so outwardly they may seem calm. Yet inwardly they coax the plane to keep flying, straight and steady, their internal murmers fueling the engine to keep the plane cruising through the air as if the minute they stopped the plane would sprial down to the ground in flames. Then there's those who will never fly because they can't take that risk. Their feet or safer on the ground, right?
...I just felt the analogy coming on and decided to go with it. Now, I'm not even sure how it relates to the point I was trying to make, except to say that literally when I'm on a plane I sit there and enjoy the ride. I love to fly. Bumps and noises don't really bother me at all. But if I was to compare that analogy with my life, I would think they do. So when the pilot gets on the PA system and announces there will be turbulance, and to remain seated until it runs its course, I just have to trust him at his word, to sit there and just enjoy my ride.
I'm getting to profound for myself right now. Stupid jet lag. My mind is wide awake, but my brain thinks I should be alseep because it's dark out.
It's dead silent right now. All I can hear is the quiet rumble of the generator outside and the clicking of the keypad. It's so peaceful. I better try to lull myself back to sleep so I can try to get back on our time.
I really had a good time on our trip. Meeting people who were studying and traveling and grasping their life and doing something with it really had an impact on me. I was a little worried that I shouldn't have gone on this trip because of the money problem. Now, I'm certain that I was supposed to. I really needed it. I think it has helped me put things in to perspective. Break that cycle of waking up doing your thing, going to bed and repeat cycle. I'm thinking and looking at the options for me and about the possibilities that lie before me. Go watch the movie last holiday with queen latifa. It was the perfect movie to end the trip with.