Searching for answers....Prayer for direction

This past month has been parodoxial....it flew by and got away from me, but at the same time it's been a long stretch of sameness. I am just going through the motions, neither here nor there...wave tossed in the sea.
My head and my heart and not in agreement and I am just one confused puppy begging for a clarity bone.
My big problem, I think, is that I lack discernment. I hate when I let myself flirt with a fantasy, a chance to explore my indepencence like it would lead to the perfect life that I could only dream of. I can not tell if the things that are on my heart are of my own self-interest, or if they are small glimpses of where God may be leading me. Would this change be an act of obedience or me jumping off the deep end, resulting in a decision I would later come to regret??
There's a fog in my brain...I don't know what I want.

I'm just sick of this world...sick of the injustices, the cruelity, the inhumanity. The innocent being victimized, and the rest of the world looking away....or desensitized. The rapes and the slaughtering, and filth people in Africa are subject to on a daily basis like in Rwanda. The terrorism in London, the bombs, the warfare in Iraq. The families torn apart. The starvation, the abuse, the hatred, the power, the rich getting richer and the poor getting poorer....the world has stopped caring. Maybe it never even cared at all....It's everwhere...all over unto the ends of the earth....and I am powerless to stop anything....It's out of my control and out of my hands and my heart greives for people...
And I'm worried about me and when will good things happend for me like an osterich with my head stuck in the sand, I was blinded by my own little world for so long...
Nowhere is good to be...just disgusted with myself, disgusted with this world, and ashamed to be part of it.

Lord, just please, show me what to do! How can I make a difference? How can I better your kingdom? How can I be a faithful servant? What can I do?