They say you are what you eat...

And that's why I'm a big chicken!!!

I have been a horrible blogger, this I know. I feel like I don't have time to write about the trivial things in my life and recently big things that have happend seem like a chore to blog about. I just have been busy with other things.

Well this is something that definately should warrent a blog entry.

I applied to a company called Home Instead to be a caregiver to make some extra money to help my mom with her financial situation a week or two ago. I was hired on the spot pretty much but they had to check my references. I have yet to be assigned to a client. (I would be helping and elderly person with simple chores around the home for a few hours and get paid decent money to do it.)

Yesterday I get a call from one of the co-owners of the franchise. At first I thought it was to offer me a shift. But she asked me why I was working at a place like Atlanta Bread. I explained to her the process of what made me land full time there. She then offered me a job with Home Instead! Like take the job if you want it offered me. The position is front desk representative. I mostly would be answering calls and doing computer work. She asked me to stop by after work to talk about it more. After I hung up the phone I got a feeling of elation and sheer joy. I thought that God was offering me a golden opportunity. Afterall, they sought me out. I just put my foot in the door and they took it from there. I could finally get back into social services instead of being stuck at boring food services...(although it's rarely ever boring at ABC...in fact this job might be more boring in the grand scheme of things....) but it was an out. I thought about it the whole day and I was in one of the best moods I've had in a while.

I danced the idea in my mind of wearing normal people clothes instead of a smelly uniform. And weekends to go places and do things and a normal schedule. It sounds awesome.

So I dropped Laura off after work at carsense so she could pick up her new used car and drove to Home Instead and met with Amy the lady who offered me the job. Then the power of reality set in. They need someone to have common sense and pay attention to detail because small mistakes cost them time and need to be avoided....and sitting at a desk all day??!? I am used to running around and being on my feet. I will get sooo tired just sitting there not doing anything. Is this job really for me....Everyone seems to be encouraging me to take it. I want to take it but I don't have very much confidence in myself considering the circumstance I found myself in last year. I certainly don't want history repeating itself. I want to be able to be good at this and it seems like there is a lot of stuff to learn. I hope if I take it I'll do well but I'm scared.

Then there's the art of actually quiting Atlanta Bread. I know how hard it is for them to find good employees and not to brag, but I am one of the strongest workers. Not everyone will be willing to work the extra hours and stay late like I do, or be willing to take on additional responsibilities. I feel like I will be leaving them hanging in the lurtch. I am a people pleaser and I do whatever I can to keep people happy. But no matter what I do I will dissapoint somone one, if not myself. I can see how no matter which choice I make the potential for regretting it. Should I stay or should I go now? I dunno.

This is why I'm a big chicken. The fear of stepping out in faith. Why do I all of a sudden have a craving for mustard??

And the blessings keep flowing

If I wasn't sure about God being at work before, I am even more sure of it now.
Thursday night at house church, I was presented with money that everyone in house church contributed to for my mom's medical expense. It was almost all the amount I needed. I very easily added a small amount to equal the amount she told me she'd have to pay back. I was so touched by that act of love that I nearly cried.

Then yesterday I got a call from my mom while I was at work and she told me that her friend finally gave her the car she had been promised from early this summer. What a relief that was to her....so my mom had a great day yesterday. She began the day with getting the car she's been hoping for and then she ended the day by receiving a money order to pay for her medical bill. I was excited that both answers to prayer were received on the same day. It was hard for her to find the patience and faith that God would pull though but she told me that she finally let go of the worry and gave it over to God and no sooner than she did he pulled through for her. And I was blessed because of it.

This is truely the work of the church the way it was meant to be...people giving the extra they have to people in need to that no one is in want. I was glad to see God's church alive and working so well. The way my mother was blessed has blessed me even more so.

I am thankful, so very thankful for the good things that are happening for me because I feel unworthy of God's favor sometimes. But the great thing about God is when you feel that way, he finds a way of letting you know you're worth it.

From dry to squeezable

I guess it's been quite a while since I last posted. I've been really busy with so much that has been going on I've barely had time to write in my own personal journal.

God has just been blessing me amazingly lately. I can't bear it sometimes. He has just brought me up to a new level of understanding and peace of heart and mind. He has shown me through the encouragement and praise of others just how valuable and special I am, and ironically enough it has come from people othere than my core group of friends. But I've come to acutally understand His ways on a deeper level and begin to let go and trust Him in ways when I've always had to keep my hand on things I've trusted him with before.

Just recently some of the blessings of God, and I say these things not to boast of myself, but because of the power of Christ working through me.

I was somehow through my actions and the way I live my life able to make Fran (the lady I cat sit for) have a burden on her heart to deepen her faith in Jesus and she actually started going to Church by herself on a regular basis and praying and spending quality time with God. She told me this the other day when she took me out to dinner and told me that she feels God put me in her life not just to be her cat sitter, but to bring her back to him and what a blessing I've been to her.

I told the people in my house church about the situation with my mom and the medical expenses she has and how I felt the burden on my heart to help her.

I felt led to pick up hours as a caregiver for HomeInstead to earn extra money to help my mom pay for her bills and maybe even save for a used car for her. I am so excited to start because I miss working with the elderly so much and I know the blessing will be even more greater than the paycheck. I just pray that God continues to use me in this new situation.

Anyway, last night someone in my house church gave the house church leader an anonymous donation for me to give to my mom and tell her it is from God's provision over her.

I was deeply touched. This is a testament to how Christians are to be like the lessons we have been learning in chruch. We are like sponges and we can be dry, if we pour out but don't receive, or nasty if we receive, but don't pour out God's blessings. But when we are at the center of his will and putting our faith into action we are filled up and in turn are poured out like a useful sponge. We are putting our faith into action, and that is the intention of the christian church from the beginning. I feel like God has just poured into me so much recently and all I want to do is be a blessing to others by doing the will of God and get farther and farther from myself.